We were going for a walk tonight when I admitted something.
"Dad," I said, "I don't know what kind of writer I am."
I feel like a giant fraud.
I adore writing. I love the process. I love the way it makes you think. But here's the thing: until January I thought I was a journalist, and...that might not be my very best fit (ah!).
My dad wasn't surprised, "You're trying to figure out who you are."
He was calm.
I on the other hand felt like, feel like, throwing up.
I just spent months building up a website based on sharing the story of other creatives via, predominantly, journalism. Why? Yes, my past, but also community. Taking an interest in other people's stories IS super interesting. And the process can be a tool for building self-confidence: you learn to pick up the phone and call a stranger and not be so nervous about prying into their life (haha, but really).
It could be better.
See, I think, in terms of online writing, I would rather write just like this. About life experiences in a non-journalistic way, and meet people through this form of sharing. And I think it really is possible.
And, of course, the elephant in the room: FICTION.
Oh, god. Since January my freaking OBSESSION with story writing has blossomed like crazy and I have this massive urge to share the writing journey online as well, in addition to honing that craft that is so poetic and gorgeous and straight up seductive. (Also, heartbreaking, but worth it.)
What led to this?
The BRILLIANT Jeff Goins. Seriously, if you are building your writing career you must follow his advice. He makes you think of your career by asking the tough questions, from which you can start to gain traction.
I'm sure you've heard of him, author of Real Artists Don't Starve; so, I won't prattle on. But check him out!
SO. I need to spend this week sorting this all out. Getting really honest with myself. I'm sure it'll come out on here, because ahhhhh I am scared. And venting is a must during scary times.
But THIS, this fear, is what the creative journey is all about. So here goes, in real time.
Thanks again to Derek for setting up this site for me :)
Okay, this is all.
Bon soir and happy father's day to ALL the dads.