Shiny Object Syndrome: Unpacking Secondary Motives for Distraction
Over the past few years, I’ve noticed myself feel incredibly inspired by people who have a laser sharp focus on their business. It feels to me very organized, calm, and, most of all, the result of being so in touch with one’s values and purpose that there is no need to question or distract from it. This sort of person, in my eyes, honours their purpose on this planet by diving deep into their work and tuning out the noise around them.
I keep iterating “in my eyes” and “I feel” to be clear that this is entirely my point of view. And the fact that this is inspiring to me is just that—inspiration the Universe has given to me because, I believe, it’s saying, “Hey, kid, sit up and take notice of this characteristic you wish to embody. This is a part of your path forward!”
So, if what you’ve read so far regarding focusing in on your business does not feel in the least inspiring to you, then probably you are not meant to read further. If you are feeling pulled to keep reading, I’d consider that your sign to do just that—not because you’re necessarily meant to agree with me, but because there is likely something in here that you’re meant to chew on.
Moving on, for some context, I spent the last decade or so experimenting with my life—including which country to live in, who to date, and, what sort of work to do. As a proponent of human design, I believe this is correct for me, and for anyone else with a 3 or a 6 in their profile—and, frankly, anyone that feels this is intuitively correct for them.
Through so much experimentation, I became crystal clear on, as the Japanese say, my ‘Ikigai,’ AKA the intersection of what one loves, is good at, may be paid for, and serves the world.
However, what I wasn’t acutely aware of was how, for years, I was pulling myself away from focusing on my Ikigai. During this time, it simply felt like I was “following my inspiration” and “seeing what worked.” And, in a way, that’s true. I would listen to podcasts of online teachers, coaches, therapists, etc. and feel so filled up with inspiration, and then I would find myself being tugged in the direction of sorting out how I could make my own version of what they had.
Note: I don’t believe I didn’t anything wrong. Just as I don’t think my clients ever “go down the wrong path.” I absolutely believe that every “detour” is actually a part of the path, holding a ton of lessons that we are meant to learn in this lifetime.
But while this wasn’t wrong, it ultimately wasn’t the MO that actually suited me for the long haul. And what I realized years in to trying all these things that ultimately “failed” was that my very first instinct—literally 7+ years ago!—to focus only on 1:1 coaching was what would be the most fulfilling (in all the ways: spiritual, mental, emotional, financial, and, consequently, physical too, as the body is always affected by the health of the rest of our being).
As I started to look at this habit of pulling myself away from what I knew was my path, the words “Shiny Object Syndrome” came to mind. This is, as Jodie Cook writes in this Forbes article, “the phenomenon of being distracted by new and exciting opportunities.”
As someone who doesn't typically follow this behavioural patterning, I had to sit with why this would've cropped up in my professional life. The more I sat with it, the more it became clear that I’d allowed insecurities to run my business. There was an undercurrent of “but maybe coaching isn’t enough” and “everyone successful around me has an app or a best-selling book.” Too, there was the fear that I wasn’t being “democratic enough” and offering something to people that was cheaper.
The gift in unearthing our unconscious thoughts is that we can 1) have compassion for ourselves, and, from there, 2) redirect ourselves in a more intentional path forward.
For myself, I had to let go of the comparison, accept that I had no desire to make an app or write a book, and that this was all for a reason. All of that is for other people—people who do have the genuine desire to pursue such things. What is for me (just as what is for you) is what I’m both insatiably fascinated by and naturally gifted at. For me, that's going deep with people in a very safe 1:1 setting.
And as for the guilt I was feeling, there was some inner-parenting to do regarding the fact that I didn’t need to be the person to cater to every single person on this planet. There are plenty of services in this world that can cater to people who prefer to spend, for instance, $40 for their personal and professional development.
I share my whole process here of unpacking my Shiny Object Syndrome in the hope that even a word or two will trigger your own thought-process regarding what may be leading you to split your focus. We never ever do things for “no reason.” There is always a motivation, even if you don’t presently know what it is.
Last note: If you feel like your focus is actually better when you're doing a multitude of things, do that! To speak of human design again for a quick moment, Manifesting Generators are designed to be doing multiple things. It's only incorrect if it's leading you in an unfruitful direction, as it was for me.
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Jodie Cook for Forbes, “Shiny Object Syndrome: The Biggest Problem For Today’s Entrepreneurs”