Feeling Safe in Presence: Letting Go of Highs, Lows, and Finding True Fulfillment

. 3 min read

More and more every day, I feel called into deeper and deeper presence, disinterested in the rushes (and come downs) that come from activities that spike dopamine. Truthfully, I have felt this calling deep down for years, and have moved into this direction, but never have I felt so safe to really go there—to shed attachments to that which doesn't genuinely nourish me, but, again, only leads to spikes (which feels like dissociation), that result in inevitable crashes (which feels grimy, like I need an energy cleanse).

This came to front of mind post caffeinated-coffee-detox, after which I started to notice that, my god, there is so much in my life that has a similar effect to consuming excess caffeine. Most notably, media consumption.

(I'm aware of the irony here, as I write and podcast and put out a fair amount myself, but I do resolve every day to finetune my own output, so that I am only putting out that which has been refined, rather than overly contributing to the excess of noise.)

Unsustainable "Quick Fixes"

In the past, I'd have these observations, and then I'd go to the extreme in an attempt to remedy what I'd noticed as quickly as possible: 0 mg of caffeine, 0 podcasts, 0 reddit scrolls... which, of course, never lasted.

At some point, I'd have a sip of tea, or I'd listen to a podcast, or I'd take a lil scroll—and then, bam, I'd be back on the rollercoaster.

Shifting Self-Talk and Opening Up New Possibilities

So, what was lifechanging for me was when I noticed how I spoke about myself. I used to say, "I have addictive tendencies." Or, "I'm very all-or-nothing" and I realized just how detrimental this self-talk truly was. The fact is, I, just like you, can choose to lean into extreme patterns, or we can choose not to.

Choosing not to tends to necessitate both unpacking why one has a preference for extreme behaviour (how it feeds you), coming into communion with our shadow parts, learning to love them, as well as doing the work to retrain your mind—to break this habit of behaviour.

Creating Sustainable Change

Which brings us right back to presence. How does one begin to actually create behaviour change? One commits to greater presence. We need to be present in order to feel when our energy shifts, when it become frenetic/dissociative, and then we must use that awareness as a queue to anchor back into the body, to come back to self, to remember how one wants to live. And move from this centred place.

While uncomfortable in the beginning, this process builds intimacy with oneself like nothing else. And, as mentioned at the top, over time, as the discomfort decreases from engaging in all of the above, you will actually find yourself feeling safe inside your own vessel and longing for more and more of the real juice of life: feeling here, present, in the here and now.

And that's when you realize... "Wow, I actually don't need anything outside of myself to feel good. I am already my dream self."

How Manifestation Ties In

As to attracting more? This is where it begins. The irony is that gratitude for the here and now is what draws more into your reality. You will be given what you're emanating. So if you really want more, fall in love with you now.

(In my opinion, the reason for this is beyond "like attracts like," and more so that when we are present, we are open to the lessons that our souls want to learn in this lifetime, we are open to the evolution that our souls have come here for. And therefore, as we absorb the lessons, live the wisdom, and commit to our continued evolution, we are "rewarded" with what it is we want. But anyway, another post for another day as there's a lot on this topic, including the quantum and how this works in.)

Apply this to your life

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With love,
Mackenzie